The Lion, the Witch and the Emmett
by leopardspotz17
Summary: It’s moving day for the Cullens, and Emmett decides to take a look around the new house. Chaos is unleashed when he finds a way into Narnia.
1. Emmett Falls Through a Window

**The Lion, the Witch, and the Emmett**

**Summary: It's moving day for the Cullens, and Emmett decides to take a look around the new house. Chaos is unleashed when he finds a way into Narnia.**

**Hi everyone! I am finally doing a fanfiction on Twilight. I thought it would be fun to write more about Emmett first because he is hilarious! Vampires in the mythical land of Narnia… this is going to be good. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Ummm… ***_**ahem**_***… well let me begin.**

**~Leopardspotz17**

**Disclaimer- I do not own Twilight or The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. Unfortunately Stephenie Meyer and C.S. Lewis beat me to the punch. ;)**

_Emmett Falls Out a Window_

Carlisle POV

This was the definition of eternal suffering. Imagine a long plane ride with Emmett, a seat behind me, who was singing Ashley Tisdale songs.

"_I could see us moving like that! Like that!_

_I could see us touching like that! Like that!_

_I could see us kissing like that! Like that!_

_Doesn't matter what he said she said!"_

sang Emmett at the top of his lungs. The flight attendant had given up a while ago and now we all had to listen to Emmett's singing. "EMMETT WILL YOU SHUT UP ALREADY!" roared an irritated Rosalie. Silence finally came over the first class section of the plane. Thank the Lord. But it was to good to be true. Only five minutes later Emmett started whistling. I buried my head in one of the complementary pillows that were brought and tried to drown him out. _How long is this flight?_ I thought to Edward. He looked up sympathetically and held up two fingers. I don't think I could take another two hours of this.

Two hours later we landed in a cloudy and overcast London. When we landed Emmett ran out and kissed the ground saying,

"Oh solid ground how I have missed thee!!!!"

"What the hell Emmett! We were the ones suffering from your horrible singing!" screeched Rosalie.

But Emmett was already off tearing through the shops in the airport. He came back with a propeller hat and cinnamon all over his face.

"Emmett… What is that on your face?" I sighed

"What?" he answered.

"You have cinnamon sugar all over your face you idiot!" snapped Edward.

"OHHHH… THAT. Well I was going to get one of those hats with a propeller on top and I got the last one. So this brat threw a cinnamon pretzel at me." Emmett said, as if this was an everyday occurrence. Actually with Emmett it usually was. We got into a rental car and the chauffeur drove us to our new home. It was a huge mansion in the London countryside. I stood outside and stretched. Esme and I walked into the house while the kids began looking around.

Edward POV

THANK GOD WE WERE OFF THAT PLANE! Emmett's singing was driving me nuts! When we got to our London mansion Emmett, Rose, Alice, Jasper, Bella, Renesmee, Jacob, and I stayed outside and looked around.

"Well I'm going to take a look at my car." said Rosalie, briskly walking toward the garage.

"And I'm going inside to get something to eat! I'm starving!" said Renesmee clutching her stomach.

"Count me in!" yelled Jacob running toward the house. Jacob was ALWAYS hungry wasn't he?

"I can't stay and chat either! My shows on!" Emmett sped off to find the nearest TV.

I snorted in amusement. Emmett was singing the Barney theme song in his head.

"Now what?" I asked, looking at Alice, Jasper and Bella.

"…TAG! YOUR IT!" Alice shouted, tapping me on the arm. In a moment they had all sped away and Bella spread her shield to cover Alice and Jasper. I ran toward Bella who was the slowest and tagged her and darted away. She swiped at me trying to in vain to tag me back. I just danced away from her flailing hand. Her brow furrowed and she growled in frustration. She turned and ran after Jasper. Our game continued on for an hour or so until Alice froze in mid-run. We all stopped and looked at her clouded eyes.

"Quick! Follow me!" she said snapping out of her vision. Alice looked concerned and we all raced toward the house.

Rosalie POV

I looked at the clock. 4:30 pm. I shut the hood of my BMW M3 convertible with a satisfied smile. I had spent a whole hour working on it and its motor purred when I turned the key. I wiped my immaculate hands on a cloth and went upstairs. I found Carlisle and Esme in the living room with my darling niece… and unfortunately the dog. I climbed the staircase to find my husband. I heard him yelling at the TV.

"COME ON DORA!!! The Blueberry Hill is RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!!! Apenas dé vuelta alrededor!!!!" he screamed at the fat animated child on the screen **(AN: I got this from "Crazy Steve" in **_**Drake and Josh**_**)**. Emmett continued, this time yelling at the monkey with the ugly boots.

"BOOTS! DON'T YOU SEE IT?!?!?!" While most husbands yell at the TV when a sports game is on, my husband is yelling at cartoons designed for small children. I hit myself on the forehead and wondered why my husband was so… _special_.

Emmett turned around and said, "Could've had a V8?"

"Emmett get off your butt and let's go find our siblings." I said heading back out the door.

"Why!" Emmett whined.

"I wanna watch Dora!" he pouted. God save me. I began to drag Emmett out the door and he was struggling all the way. He finally stopped and said

"Goodbye!" Then his hand was yanked out of mine as he decided to escape out the nearest window. I sighed and looked out the window. Emmett was gone. Weird. Usually he would be waiting at the bottom to wave _then_ run away. Oh well. I went back downstairs to work on Emmett's Jeep Wrangler.

Alice POV

Jasper was chasing me when the vision hit me. _Rosalie was dragging Emmett down the stairs. Emmett escaped by leaping out the nearest window. He dropped landing lightly on his feet. He looked back up but the window was gone. He was in a strange unfamiliar forest._

The vision faded away and I called "Quick! Follow me!" We were off, sprinting towards our house. I ran up the staircase and stopped at the window. I looked out of it and saw the forest floor and a tree. But this wasn't one of Earth's trees.

"What is going on?" asked Bella.

I gulped, "Emmett has fallen into another world."

**And that concludes the first chapter of **_**The Lion the Witch and the Emmett**_**. I like the story so far. Also I have a poll up on my profile on topics of stories I was thinking of writing. Please vote! Coming up in this story Emmett will meet the half goat half man. Review! It'll make me happy and I will post faster! I'm hopping for 10 reviews please! \m/(.)\m/ Rock on.**


	2. Emmett in Narnia

**Here's chapter two! I know I didn't get 10 reviews but I've gotten some people adding this to their favorite stories and that made me just as happy! I'm so glad that this is being read XD. This chapter is pretty short but I wanted to post this. Emmett meets Mr. Tumnus! I'll have to look at the **_**Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe**_** again because I want to follow the story line. Read and Review! :D**

**Disclaimer- I don't own **_**Twilight **_**or the **_**Chronicles of Narnia**_**. But I own this crossover!**

_Emmett in Narnia_

Emmett POV

I looked back up at the window to wave at Rose but the window was gone. Hmm… Weird. Maybe I should- OH TWINKLY LIGHT! There was a lamppost in the middle of the woods. I stared at the light bulb until I heard something behind me. I whirled around to see a goat. Mmmmm… Lunch. Oh damn! The top part of the goat was a dude! To eat or not to eat… Oh wait a second it was talking.

"Son of Adam! I am Mr. Tumnus. Nice to meet you." He reached out to shake my hand.

"Um, I'm Emmett, the son of Carlisle Mr. Tummy." I replied.

"Mr. TUMNUS." said Mr. Tummy.

"Ok Mr. Tummy. Where am I anyways?" I asked.

"You, young Emmett, are in the magical land of Narnia! Follow me please." bubbled Mr. Tummy. I followed Mr. Tummy to a little house. He went in and I had to duck under the doorway. A fire was blazing in the fireplace.

"FIRE!!!!!! CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!! NO, I'VE GOT IT!" I yelled, as I took Mr. Tummy's coat and smothered the flames.

"There… All better!" I said smiling. Mr. Tummy was looking forlornly at the remnants of his coat.

"Erm. So tell me son of Adam-"

"CARLISLE."

"Son of Carlisle. Do you have bothers and sisters?" finished Mr. Tummy.

"OH YES! There's Edward, Jasper, Alice, Bella, and Rosalie!"

"How delightful. Do you plan on bringing them here?" he asked. I was about to say no when I heard someone calling my name.

"EMMETT! WHERE ARE YOU, YOU IDIOT?!" I heard Edward shout. I ran outside with Mr. Tummy following me.

"Eddy-kins! Watch your language." I said, coming out of the hut. My siblings were standing near the lamppost. Edward was glaring at me. _Cool your jets Edweirdo._ I thought to him. He flipped me off. _Meanie…_

"Emmett, who is this?" asked Bella, looking at Mr. Tummy.

"I am Mr. Tumnus and- oh, why hello there, Mr. Beaver!" said Mr. Tummy. _Beaver? LUNCH!_ I thought.

"No Emmett! Don't!" yelled Edward.

"Sons of Adam! Welc-" I bit into the beaver. It stopped in mid-sentence and made a gurgling noise. I drained it of blood and stood up again. _Refreshing._ I thought. I looked at Mr. Tummy who was looking really freaked.

"Mr. Tummy, are you okay?" I asked. Mr. Tummy ran. Everyone was glaring at me.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Emmett, you are so stupid that I don't even have words to describe how brainless you are." snapped Jasper.

Edward POV

God Emmett is so stupid. We had tied a rope onto the railing of the stairs so we could get back once we found Emmett. I searched for "Mr. Tummy's" mind and, boy, the goat-man was freaking out.

_Holy crepes! That boy just killed Mr. Beaver! I must inform someone! I must tell Aslan! The trees were probably watching… The White Witch will be after them for sure!_ His thoughts were jumbled with shock. But really? "Crepes"? I looked to Emmett.

"Great job, you just killed one of the citizens. Now goat-man is going to alert everyone. We'd better get out of here." I said. I turned to look for the rope that seemed to be standing strait up in the air on it's own. I gave it a tug and began to climb. But before I could make it to the top the rope fell. I landed back on the ground. Well that's wonderful. Now we were all stuck here.

Third Person POV

Esme had gotten up from the couch and made her way upstairs to look for Emmett who was being unusually quiet. As she walked up the stairs and saw a thick rope tied to the banister and hung out the window. Esme sighed. Emmett was always doing something odd so Esme wasn't surprised. She untied the rope and it disappeared out the window.

**Now all the Cullen siblings are in Narnia. Good job Emmett. Hope this was good. I loved the part with "Mr. Tummy". I feel bad for the beaver though. :P. I do hope that this incident won't repeat itself when Edward sees Aslan… Bwahahaha!!!! READ AND REVIEW!!!! Here's an awesome quote- "Death: the #1 killer in America." While your telling your friends about death also tell them about this story!**


	3. The Woman in White

**Update! I finally typed this up today. I was reading City of Glass. For those that don't know it's the third book to the Mortal Instruments Series. Here's what I think about the book: AWESOME! MUST READ AGAIN! If you have not read this series you haven't truly lived yet. Thanks to all who have reviewed and who have added this to their favorite stories list.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the themes featured in this fanfiction.**

_The Woman in White_

Jasper POV

Whoa, this place is weird. First "Mr. Tummy", then a talking beaver and now I was senses emotions from everywhere around me. I looked at Edward who shot a look at the trees. Wow, this place has everything. Even emo trees.

"Leave it to Emmett to fall into a different world." I grumbled.

"It's called Narnia." Emmett corrected.

"OH WONDERFUL! Narnia! Did you hear that! Narnia!" Rosalie spat. Massive waves of rage rolled off her. Scratch that. Everyone was angry with Emmett.

"Come on. We're not going to get anywhere yelling at Emmett. Let's just find someone to get us out of here." sighed Bella.

"FINALLY! Someone's on my side!" said Emmett.

"No Emmett. It just means she hates being here more than she hates you at the moment." snapped Alice. We started walking one direction while Emmett was sulking behind us. We were walking for about an hour when Bella stopped.

"Where's Emmett?" she asked. I turned around but Emmett was nowhere in sight. I looked to Alice whose eyes immediately clouded over searching for Emmett. She and Edward sighed at the same time and shook their heads.

"It looks like Emmett's making another friend." said Edward turning around to go find Emmett.

Emmett POV

_Why was everyone mad at me? All I did was jump out a window… and eat a beaver. How was I supposed to know it was considered a person?_ I looked up. I couldn't see my siblings anywhere. Now they deserted me. I walked in a random direction not even bothering to find my siblings. _I'll find my own way home_. I thought. _All I need is some ruby slippers…_

"Why hello there!" said a voice. I snapped out of my thoughts to see a woman in a white dress.

"Um, hi?" I said. We were in a clearing and the woman was sitting in a sleigh.

"What's with the midget?" I added looking at the short man at the reins. He growled at me in response.

"Don't mind him. What is your name?" said the woman. She was pretty but something was off about her. She didn't even smell like a human. Or a vampire. Or a werewolf!

"What's yours?" I said suddenly suspicious.

"I am the queen of this beautiful land!" she answered, with a smile. The smile didn't quite reach her eyes. I tensed ready for a fight.

"Relax! I'm a friend." she said, seeing my stance.

"Would you like some chocolates?" she inquired as a box appeared in her hand. I looked at it in wonder. It came out of thin air.

"No thanks, I'm… allergic." I answered improvising. She frowned

"What about if I made you a prince? You could help me rule this country!" she said. Pssssh… Sure. A "queen" just goes around looking for random people to give important titles to. Something was definitely up. I MUST INVESTIGATE! Dr. Emmett Holmes on the case!

"That sounds like fun!" I said. In response the woman patted the seat next to her and I sat down. The sleigh was as cold as ice, although the woman seemed fine. I finally looked at the environment around me. It was winter and everything was coated in a thick layer of snow. I didn't hear any animals for miles. Yes, something was very off indeed.

Edward POV

I watched Alice's vision with her and saw Emmett wandering through the woods.

_He stopped and looked for us but weren't there. He scowled and headed in a different direction. As he entered a clearing his head snapped up to see a woman sitting in a sleigh. They talked and Emmett got into the sleigh. They rode off through the forest. The driver, who was a short dwarf-like creature, smiled creepily._ The vision faded away and I sighed. Emmett was able to take care of himself but now we'd have to chase after him again.

"It looks like Emmett's making another friend." I explained. I ran in the direction of the sleigh and everyone followed behind me. I thought back to the dwarf's smile. I knew Emmett would be fine but something about both the woman and the driver worried me. I searched for Emmett's mind and found it about a mile away. I could only hear fragments of his thoughts due to the distance but as we gained on the sled I could hear him clearly.

_Duh duh dun uh! I am Emmett Holmes! Detective extraordinaire! I will crack the case of the Woman in White! Dun dun duh duh..._

I shut out Emmett's mind as he added his own background music. So Emmett noticed the strangeness of the two as well. I tried to read the woman's mind but all I got was silence. But it wasn't like the silence I got from my Bella. This was like hitting a cold hard wall. I gave up and tried the driver. I heard him loud and clear.

_Who knew we'd find another son of Adam so soon! The trees were right when they passed on that this one was big. It'll be hard to keep him shut away…_

There was something in the dwarf's thoughts that were distinctly evil. I motioned for everyone to come next to me.

"There is something really wicked about these two. I say we let Emmett go with them and I'll read his mind to figure out what they're doing. I'm curious and it feels like something is horribly wrong here." I said, slowing to a stop. Jasper nodded immediately. Who knows what feelings were radiating off of the woman and the dwarf. Alice nodded too and took Jasper's arm. We ran back towards the still moving sleigh sneaking in the shadows. After about an hour of keeping pace with the sled we saw a grand castle on the horizon. It was made of ice and reflected the light of the setting sun. Its towers spiraled up ominously piercing the blood red sky.

**Am I the only one who loved that ending? Thought I'd put some description in there. I really need to find my copy of **_**The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe**_** because I'll need to refer to it when I continue writing. I don't want to get too many things wrong. In fact I don't want to get anything wrong because I'm a perfectionist. For whoever is a perfectionist here's a funny quote- "The secret to perfection is that if at first you don't succeed erase all evidence that you ever tried."**


	4. Son of Carlisle Meet Son of Adam

**Hey! Updating finally! This features more of Emmett's wonderful singing. :D Hope you guys are having a nice weekend and hope that you have a great Easter tomorrow! I wish egg hunts could be more fun. My friends and I have come up with the Ultimate Egg Hunt. Basically you have two teams of people. Each team is really big like maybe thirty people or more. There is one camouflage colored egg about double the size of a softball. It's hidden in a forest and each team tries to find it before the other does. But here's the twist. Each person gets a paintball gun and if you're hit you're out of the game. So the first team to find the egg wins but if everyone on your team is out the other team wins by default. That would be an egg hunt I'd love to be in. To bad we don't have the paintball guns or the protective vests. Otherwise we'd probably do it.**

**Disclaimer: I own squat.**

_Son of Carlisle Meet Son of Adam_

Emmett POV

"56 bottles of beer on the wall! 56 bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around, 55 bottles of beer on the wall!" I sang. I was surprised I wasn't tired yet, considering I had started at 500 bottles.

"Emmett? Could you please sing a different song?" asked the woman. She was rubbing her temples as if she had a headache.

"Sure!" I said taking a deep breath.

"I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves! Everybody's nerves! Everybody's nerves! I know a song that get's on everybody's nerves! And this is how it goes! Dun dun duh!" I sang for a couple more minutes until I saw that the midget was clenching his fists so tightly that his knuckles were turning white.

"What's the deal with him? I thought Oompa Loompas liked music." I said, pointing at the driver. Before the midget had the chance to explode from irritation we reached the castle.

"Here we are!" said the woman. She and the midget went through the doors and I lagged behind. _It's made of ice! This would be the ultimate snow fort…_

"Emmett focus!" I whirled around searching for the source of the voice. Behind me was Edward.

"Get out of my head!" I said at vampire speed.

"Emmett. Listen to me. Once you find out what's going on in there come back. DO NOT get distracted." he said.

"Don't worry! I am so focused." I replied. I walked in and the double doors slammed behind me.

Third Person POV

Edward ran back to his waiting siblings.

"So?" asked Bella.

"He said he wouldn't get distracted, but I have my doubts." he answered.

"I'm sure Emmett will do the best of his ability." said Alice.

"We're doomed." Rosalie groaned.

************************************************************************************************************

Emmett entered the castle to see a grand foyer with doors lining each wall. He glimpsed the woman and her driver disappearing through the door directly across the way he had come. He ran through the doors to see what could've barely been described as a garden. It was an open space covered in frozen grass. But the strangest things were the many statues. They were lifelike figures in the forms of leopards, centaurs, elves, and other mythical creatures. The unnerving feature that they all had was the fearful or raged expressions carved onto their faces.

Emmett stood still in and examined the statues. He looked around carefully for the woman or her driver and pulled a marker out of his pocket. When Emmett finally left the garden a big smile was plastered on his face. Suddenly something hit him hard on the back. He stumbled out of shock and looked over his shoulder to see the driver on his back. The small man's arms were clasped tightly around Emmett's neck. They struggled until Emmett collapsed onto the marble floor with a heavy thud.

Emmett found himself in a dungeon hours later. He took a look around. The cell was cramped. The ceiling was about three feet off the ground and was made of ice. In face so was the whole prison. In the next cell over Emmett saw someone strikingly familiar.

"Mr. Tummy!" Emmett yelled, sending echoes down the hall. The faun groaned and turned toward Emmett.

"I'm so sorry… I've betrayed one already and now your stuck here too." the faun whispered. Mr. Tumnus rolled over onto his side and faced the wall.

"No. I've betrayed my whole family. It's more my fault." Emmett turned to see a small boy talking.

"Hi. My name's Edmund Pevensie." said the boy.

"I'm Emmett. Now let's get out of here." said Emmet breaking the ice bars like twigs. He swiped at Edmund's and Mr. Tumnus' bars and the ice shattered as they hit the floor. Emmett swung Mr. Tumnus over his shoulder and looked at Edmund. The boy's eyes were wide and his mouth was open in shock.

"You coming?" asked Emmett. The boy scrambled to his feet and Emmett sat the boy on his shoulders.

************************************************************************************************************

Edward saw Emmett speeding out of the castle. Emmett reached his family panting. He set Mr. Tumnus on the ground and Edmund leapt off his back.

"Emmett you make friends everywhere you go don't you?" Edward sighed.

"Hey! I thought I did a pretty good job!" Emmett replied.

"Dude! You were taken down by a dwarf!" Jasper scoffed.

"I can explain that!" yelled Emmett.

"Fine then, explain." replied Jasper smiling. He knew how irritated this was making Emmett.

"Well, being the amazing actor I am, I pretended that I had gone unconscious when the midget jumped me. I thought that I would learn more if I didn't kill him. So shrimpy brought me to the woman who discussed her evil plan with him. But I listened to the whole thing. Not that it mattered much. I had no idea what they were talking about. Something about someone named "Aslan" and then about taking over Narnia. Then I was put in a cell next to these two." Emmett finished. The whole time Edmund's eyes were getting bigger and bigger.

"I must warn them! I must warn Aslan!" Edmund babbled. He then proceeded to run across the snow towards who knows where.

"I think he went insane while he was in there." said Rosalie, shooting a look at Edmund.

"We don't like the term 'insane'. We prefer 'mentally hilarious'."

"Well he probably knows where to get help. Come on. Let's follow the kid." said Alice running up to Edmund.

**So now the Cullens have meet Edmund Pevensie. I hope I've spelled that right. R&R please! Also I still have a poll up on my profile that I'd like people to vote on. It's on what fanfiction I should write next. And for those out there that like the Mortal Instruments series I've made a fanfiction for that too. It's called Deceived. Please read! :D Quote: "I dream of a better tomorrow where chickens can cross the road without being questioned."**


	5. The Pevensie's

**Update! This is my longest chapter yet (I think) so I would like to give myself a congratulatory pat on the back :) But my neck is hurting from bending over my computer. Hope you like this! Remember to R&R!**

**Disclaimer- I own Twilight! Oh wait, no, that's Stephenie Meyer. I own the Chronicles of Narnia! Damn it, that's owned by C.S. Lewis. Oh well.**

_The Pevensie's_

**Emmett POV**

We had been following Edmund for forever! We ended up walking across a frozen lake and the scenery never changed. At one point Mr. Tummy refused to keep going so we just left him there. This is his world anyway he'll be fine. Finally we reached the forest. I sped to the front of the group when I smelled peppermint. I was nearing the source of the smell when I met my idol.

"SANTA!!!!!!!!!!!!" I yelled. In the clearing Santa was sitting in his sleigh with his reindeer. There were some other people too, but I didn't care. I ran to sit on Santa's lap.

"I want a fire truck, and a flamethrower, and Jupiter, and a chicken named Bill!" I said to Santa.

"Emmett, please get off. Your cutting off my blood circulation." said Santa. I jumped off. Meanwhile Edmund was talking to the other people that were there. Turned out the people were kids. There was a little girl with what looked like a perfume bottle, an older girl with a bow and a horn, and an even older boy with a sword.

"What are those?" I asked pointing to the items they held.

"Um gifts. Who are you?" asked the older boy warily.

"HOW COME THEY GOT GIFTS?! I want something too!!!!!!" I yelled, glaring at Santa. It looked like Edward and Jasper were pretty pissed too.

"Hold up. You gave weapons to children?" Jasper asked exasperated.

"You probably don't even know how to use these!" He scoffed.

"And you do?" asked the older boy of which I do not know the name of. In response Jasper snatched the sword and jumped onto and tree. In a matter of minutes Jasper had carved a statue of himself with the sword. The kids were shocked, probably because he had moved so fast. And to top it all off, Jasper grabbed the girl's bow and shot an arrow into the trees. A bird fell to the ground with a thump. He tossed the bow back to what's-her-face.

"My point exactly." said Jasper brushing off his hands. Edward turned on the smallest girl.

"And what exactly is that for?" he asked, pointing to the bottle.

"It's special. It heals people." she said proudly.

"Of course! You give medical supplies to a little kid instead to someone with a medical degree!" Edward spat, turning to Santa. But the fat man was gone. Instead there was a chicken.

"BILL!!!!!" I yelled running to pick up the chicken.

"We never introduced ourselves. I'm Alice, this is Jasper, Edward, Rosalie, Bella, and the crazy one with the chicken is Emmett." said Alice putting out a hand. The older boy shook it.

"I'm Peter, this is Lucy, that's Susan, and I see that you've already meet Edmund." said Peter.

"So. Narnia. Weird right?" Rosalie asked Susan.

"Wait your not Narnians? Then how…" Susan trailed off looking at Jasper.

"How'd Jasper move so fast? Well I guess it's safe to tell here. You guys ok with it?" Alice said, looking to Edward. He shrugged, as did everyone else. It's not like it would be weird here. Plus if they told people in the real world no one would believe them.

"We're vampires. But we're not like what you think. We can go out into the sun, we don't drink human blood, and we don't live in crypts. Instead we have superhuman speed, strength, sight, hearing, smell, etc." explained Alice.

"And don't forget stunningly good looks." said Rose, examining her nails. I looked at the humans who were taking the news considerably well. Then again who knows what they've seen here. There was only one thing wrong. Peter was staring at **my **Rosalie. Grrr… I leapt at him growling but my darling brothers stepped in front of me. I came within inches from the kid snarling but Edward and Jasper were holding me back.

"Yeah… word of warning. If you stare at our girls you'll die." said Jasper, dragging me back. Peter was already looking down at his feet. Good.

Edward POV

After we'd stopped Emmett from killing Peter the humans filled us in on the whole situation. Basically the woman we saw, commonly called the White Witch, had formed a dictatorship. So Narnia was stuck in eternal winter. But because the humans came they fulfilled a prophecy that they'd free Narnia. Now they're seeking the help of "Aslan" who is a savior here. Apparently there's a war coming and they need help. Yeah. This isn't crazy at all.

I snapped out of my thoughts as we neared a river. It was frozen over but you could large cracks in the ice. The temperature had begun to warm up and the land was thawing. It would be incredibly dangerous for the humans.

"Ok here's the plan. We carry you guys over the river." I said.

"Wait? What do you mean carry us?" Lucy began. In response Alice picked her up and took a running jump over the river. Lucy's thrilled shriek filled the air.

"THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!" Lucy yelled at the top of her lungs.

"You next." said Emmett pointing at Peter. His face turned ashen at the thought of it.

"I'll go." said Edmund.

"Whatever. All the same to me." Emmett lifted Edmund onto his shoulders and took a running jump like Alice. But he went much higher. Which proved to be all the better because at that moment a big wolf leapt at Emmett, teeth bared. But it missed and fell back onto the ice. Emmett landed next Alice who stood protectively in front of Lucy. A great crack filled the air as the ice continued to break. I hurriedly picked up Peter and jumped over to Alice and Emmett. Rosalie did the same with Susan.

A pack of wolves were now on both sides of the river and on the river itself. Jasper and Bella were on one bank and Emmett, Rose, Alice and I with the humans on the other.

"What are we going to do?!" screamed Susan.

"What else? We fight." said Peter drawing his sword clumsily. We all looked at him and I raised an eyebrow.

"Wrong, you stay here while we take care of the dogs." I said.

"Now, who's going to babysit the humans?" asked Alice. A responding chorus of "not it!"s left Rosalie to stay with the kids.

"Ready Jazzy?" called Alice across the river. He nodded and flew at the closest wolf. Bella did the same and soon all the wolves were lying stone dead on the ice. We made sure to move too fast for the eye to follow to spare the humans nightmares. We also refrained from feeding then and there.

Bella and Jasper joined us just as the ice broke on final time. The bodies of the wolves were swept down the river.

"I wonder why those wolves were attacking us." said Alice.

"They're the White Witch's henchmen. They've been following us for quite a while now. We'd been avoiding them pretty well with the Beavers. But we were separated and we haven't seen them since." answered Lucy. When the humans turned to continue through the forest we all shot Emmett a dirty look.

He glared back at us. _HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_ Emmett screamed in his head. Oww… Emmett left my head ringing. I counted everyone to make sure that we were all together. But I came one short.

"Emmett what happened to Bill?" I asked. All I got from Emmett's mind was a picture of chicken nuggets.

**Poor Bill! Random right? I liked this chapter. Next they meet Aslan. Hopefully Edward can control himself. No promises though. I shall end with a quote! "****A true friends equal you cry I cry, you fight I fight, you jump off a bridge I get a paddle boat and save your stupid ass." :D**


	6. Here Kitty, Kitty

**Hey peoples! Sorry this took so long. Writer's block. That and history homework. Aslan appears in this chapter! Hence the title. Also Bella POV. Not much left to say except THANKS to everyone who has reviewed! Your comments are the best! And to TwilightFanpireFreak – Skits? Nice. That's pretty funny. And odd. But funny! Teachers do the weirdest things.**

**Disclaimer – I own Twilight in my dreams… ;)**

_Here Kitty, Kitty_

Edward POV

_Dashing through the snow!_

_On a pair of broken skies!_

_Over the hills we go!_

_Crashing into trees!_

_The snow is turning red!_

_I think I'm almost dead!_

_And now I'm in the hospital with stitches in my head!_

"Emmett, will you shut your trap!" I groaned. Emmett stopped immediately. I sighed with relief until Emmett began singing in his head.

"Emmett!"

"What?" he asked innocently. I leaped at him, knocking him to the ground. We rolled knocking down trees and anything else in the immediate area. Emmett pinned me, grinning like a maniac.

"Nice try Eddie." he smirked. I just smiled and kicked him… er… somewhere. Emmett fell off me groaning.

"Hey! What's with all the hubbub?" demanded Alice. We all gave her a look.

"Hubbub?" asked Emmett between groans.

"You know, brouhaha?" said Alice.

"Gesundheit." I said.

"Like hullabaloo?" said Alice.

"Um Alice? Are you ok?" Jasper said, concerned.

"Yup! I'm awesome! How about you Jazzy?" bubbled Alice brightly. Yeah. Narnia was definitely getting to her. I tuned in her thoughts but all I saw were scenes from the Disney movie _Bambi_. In fact when she thought about when Bambi's mother died she started dry sobbing.

"So, how do we get out of here?" I turned to the humans, who were watching the recent display with confusion.

"Uh, well we came from a wardrobe. It was in our Uncle's huge mansion. We were playing hide and seek when Lucy came to Narnia."

"Really?! I fell out a window! But we can't find it again. It looked like it was only one way." chattered Emmett, finally getting out of his position on the ground.

"C'mon, let's find this Aslan so we can get out of here." snapped Rosalie, briskly walking ahead of us. Suddenly the forest thinned, leaving us in a field. A horse cantered up to us before we could get any further. Scratch that. Make that a centaur. He held a bow an arrow pointing it at Emmett.

"Wow, you guys are really hospitable." muttered Emmett.

"Who are you people? Henchmen of the White Witch?" demanded the centaur.

"Let them be! Sons and Daughters of Adam! Welcome. I am Aslan." The magnificent voice erupted from an equally stunning lion. I froze. Lion? My mouth started to water and before I could think about it I was leaping at the lion. It roared in surprise and ran. It was faster than I could give credit for. Whenever I got close it would disappear only to reappear farther away.

But I could tell I saw running it down. Its movements were slower and I smiled. Check Mate. All of a sudden I was knocked to the ground by what seemed like a pregnant elephant. I looked over my shoulder to see Emmett. Close enough.

"And you thought me eating the beaver was bad. That was the famous Aslan dude! I'm holding this over your head forever!" Emmett smirked. I just smiled at him and his eyes widened. For the second time that day Emmett was laying on the ground in pain.

"Edward! I thought you more control than that! You were tempted by me for countless months and were fine! Now you see a lion and lose it? What is going on here?!" Bella continued to storm around until she got tired of yelling at us. Wow, Narnia really was getting to everyone. Except Rosalie. I looked toward her and saw that she was looking at her reflection in a small puddle. It was almost as shallow as Rosalie herself. So let's see. Alice is going nuts, I'm losing my control, Bella is getting increasingly agitated, Emmett is more Emmett than ever, and Jasper keeps looking at the trees confusedly. His thoughts read, _Emo trees…_

Meanwhile, the centaur was trying in vain to calm the distressed lion. The beast was shaking and I was pretty sure it started shedding right there out of anxiety.

"But I'm Aslan! No one can defeat Aslan…" mumbled the lion. I still can't think of this oversized cat as the leader of a rebellion. Everyone was giving me nasty looks. The humans were nowhere to be seen. Whatever. I'm dying of thirst as it is. Must find something…

Bella POV

Grrrrrrrrrrr!!! I cannot believe Edward! He just ruined our chance of getting back! How are we going to get Aslan's help if Edward is trying to eat him! WE'RE DOOMED TO ETERNAL LIFE IN THIS NUTHOUSE!!!!!! Ok, Bella. Calm thoughts. Breathe in. Breathe out.

I looked around to see that I had stormed my way into the middle of the campsites. Everyone was staring…. If I could still blush I would have been as red as a tomato. I stumbled into the nearest tent I could find. I turned to be face to face with a little girl. Lucy, I realized. She paled and stumbled back. Susan froze behind her. Apparently they saw Edward attack their beloved lion.

"It's ok." I said softly.

"My idiot husband has caught control of himself. I honestly don't know what has gotten into him. He's usually better than this."

"That's alright. We were just a bit shocked seeing him move so fast. And with such ferocity." Lucy mumbled. She trailed off and looked at her feet. Susan relaxed and went back to preparing her mattress on the floor. Ah, the needs of humans. It feels like just yesterday that I was Bella Swan, an average girl in Forks, Washington.

"Hey, Bella?" Lucy voice broke my reverie.

"Yes?"

"We were just about to go eat. Would you like to come with us?" I thought for a minute. My throat was burning with thirst. Wasn't there anything we could eat? Well it couldn't hurt to give them company.

"Sure, I'll go." Lucy beamed at me. My heart melted. What a sweet little girl, yet the way she walked gave the illusion that she owned the place. She would be one to rely upon. Along the way I saw some of the weirdest things I have ever seen in my, er, half-life. Centaurs galloped by, bows slung over their shoulders, and nymphs constantly changing from women into cherry blossoms. Then there were the animals. Foxes, leopards, rabbits, and any other woodland creature you could name. We rounded a corner and saw a long banquet table. It looked odd in the middle of this open field.

As soon as we came into view all conversation stopped. Whether it was the surprise of seeing the humans or the surprise of seeing me I couldn't tell. Lucy and Susan walked to sit across from their brothers who were seated near the head of the table. At the head was the lion from before. Aslan. I shrunk into the shadows of the tents to avoid eyes. But all were fixed on the human siblings.

"Let us welcome the Sons and Daughters of Adam! And the, er, Sons and Daughters of Carlisle…" I flinched. Apparently Emmett had gotten to Aslan too…

"And let me assure you that the incident this morning was an accident and they mean no harm. So please overlook this fault and welcome them." Aslan finished, although everyone was now glaring at me. Damn Edward…

The next morning I stayed with the girls. The whole day was either talking with woodland creatures or preparing for the war that was eventually coming. When we reached the archery range I saw Jasper. He and a centaur were arguing angrily.

"What are you mad about now Jasper?" I sighed.

"Pony-boy here thinks he's a better archer than I am!" Jasper spat.

"Because it's true! No one can beat the skill of a centaur in archery!" he boomed.

"You wanna make a bet? If I win you have to worship the very ground I walk on."

"Oh yeah? Well that's fine with me! And if I win you worship me!" I smirked at the foolish centaur. I had seen more bets than anyone else in the world. Jasper and Emmett were the kings of bets. The centaur strung his bow and took careful aim at the farthest target, one almost a football field away. He released the bowstring and the arrow flew threw the air and landed with a thunk on the bull's-eye. He trotted off to the side, looking quite happy with himself.

Jasper grinned. He took about two seconds to string his bow and shoot at the same target. I could tell he was slowing it down so the centaur could see him. The air was filled with the resounding crack as Jasper's arrow split the centaur's one in half, and buried itself into the bull's-eye. The centaur's jaw dropped. He just pointed in disbelief at the target.

"A deal's a deal, my friend. Better start kissing the ground I walk on." Jasper said, pushing past the stunned creature.

"Should've known better." I sighed toward the centaur, passing him to follow Susan and Lucy back to their tent.

**Tada! He really should've known better. Hehehe… Go Jasper. Anyways I hope you liked it! Don't really know where I'm going next… I'll think of something! :D Review as always and again sorry I took so long. I'd better update **_**Deceived **_**too… **


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